Battle of Wills
by Ellielyse
Summary: It wasn't my fault I just so happened to stow away on his ship – really, it wasn't. Toss in the fact that I'm a Revolutionary with highly classified information being chased by the government, and you've got my life. Welcome aboard, stranger. OC/Kidd
1. Chapter 1

Ello my peeps, I hope you enjoy this first instalment on my take of a Kidd/OC romance! (Let's see how this disaster turns out, eh?) No worries, Kidd will show up in the next chapter. Oh, and the main character's name in this was chosen purely because I liked it. So if you recognise the name, I'm just gonna say now that I had _no idea_ the name existed until I Google-ed it. Oh Google, how I love you.

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Disclaimer: I do not own One Piece.

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**C****hapter One: Impel Down? No Thanks.**

"She seems harmless to me."

I rolled my eyes as the snippet of conversation floated towards my cell. Obviously, the two patrol guards thought I couldn't hear them talking, and about me no less.

Besides, I'd heard that particular phrase a million times before, it not more. Many would take one look at my ditzy girl act and immediately brand me someone not worthy of attention; people were naïve like that. Most only saw skin deep, though rather than being slightly offended, I was actually grateful for my innocent appearance, as it helped me get away with much more than some shifty-eyed dude would.

Currently, I was caught and stuffed in a meat locker – ergo, an iron bar cell below deck – and making my way to Impel Down, no less. Yep, you heard right: Impel Down, the most feared prison in the entire world. You're probably a little confused, though. Let's rewind for a moment, and catch you all up.

So, hi, I'm Sadie. Sadie Hawkins. No, I'm not related to the greatest swordsman in the world, or to the homeless person living in that dark alley up your street. You know who I'm talking about, don't deny it. Anyway, I'm just Sadie – Sade to most people – and I'm, shockingly enough, a Revolutionary.

Now, before you freak out on me and such, just hear me out. Yeah, I'm a Revolutionary. Yeah, I see absolutely no point in the marine system and their 'Absolute Justice' rubbish. No, I'm not particularly nervous about possibly spending the rest of my life in one of the most feared prisons in the world, but I have a legitimate reason for that, so don't go thinking I'm some super girl who can tear people apart with my teeth or something equally as farfetched.

But you're still probably wondering how exactly I got into this mess in the first place. Well, let me tell you, _I_ certainly hadn't seen it coming.

About three days previous, I was just minding my own business, you know? I had docked on an island that I had been assigned to, and was doing the usual: creeping around the territory, scoping out the village; normal stuff. It was my job to snoop up some information on the marine headquarters: rumour had it, the captain in charge of the island had certain information that I was bound to appreciate.

Anyway, I was just stalking the perimeter of the giant marine building, looking like just another face in the crowd. So imagine my surprise when a horde of marines surrounded me all of a sudden, ordering me to stand down and stuff like that, in the name of Justice, of course.

Who the hell is this Justice dude, anyway?

Ha, I kid you. I'm not _that_ dumb; I've made it this far in life, haven't I? Only I'm currently on a ship to Impel Down, so maybe I'm not all that smart.

Sorry, sorry, I'm getting off track here. So where was I? Ah, yes. The marines. So, a bunch of these morons in matching outfits start telling me to stand down and some shit, and all I can think is, _what the hell is going on_? So finally, after they've completely surrounded me, the ensign, I think, steps into the middle of the circle and holds out this sheet of paper.

I'm all, _wow, a piece of paper, whoop-de-doo_, but _then _he unfurls it and lo-and-behold, it's a wanted poster of _me_! I'm not so thrilled, however. I mean, I looked so caught off guard and disorientated in the picture. My plain, shoulder-length white-blonde hair was all tangled like I'd just woken up or something, and my eyes were glassy and unfocused and nothing like the normal (dull) blue it usually was. When the hell had I let my defenses down long enough for them to snap the picture?

Or maybe I've always looked like that?

Shit, I officially hate epiphanies.

Right. Back to the story. They presented me with my bounty, which I had no idea I had until the moment; it looked pretty recent so it was understandable. Twenty-three million beli isn't too bad, considering, though it's next to nothing compared to all those rookies of the Grand Line. Besides, I probably only had the bounty because of all the dirty little secrets I'd scrounged up about the marines over the years.

After I was shown my wanted poster – I was lovingly dubbed "'Sorceress' Sadie Hawkins," isn't that cool? – the ensign character proceeded to announce that he was going to capture me and present my sorry hide to his captain.

Now, I'd love to say that I beat him with a club easily, before proceeding to wipe out the remaining lowly marines with just a flick of my hair, but unfortunately, I'd be lying if I said that, so let's just say that I was pinned to the ground in about two seconds, flat, and leave it at that.

As you can see, I'm not much of a warrior. As in, I can't fight to save a life. But anyway, flash forward a little. I get caught, I spit in the captain's face, and said captain gets mad and sentences me to a pitiful life in Impel Down – but not before I deftly nick some important looking documents off his desk. Booyah.

And we're back to the present.

"Alright, soldiers! We should be arriving at the Florian Triangle in about an hour, so be prepared!" The guards were gone, and I strained to overhear the announcement taking place above deck. When I heard the devastating news, I began to feel a worm of doubt wiggle inside of me.

What if my plan didn't work; what if I actually had to go and live the rest of my days in prison? I was too young to be subjected to that torture! Frowning at my spot against the hard, cool wall, I slid up against the gravelly surface and drew myself to my full height, looking through the small peephole I had made for myself previously, just above the waves on the other side. Now, I know what you're going to say: _wouldn't they have taken away all your weapons? How could you have made the hole?_

Bear with me for a moment here. You'll find out in due time.

I scanned the seas for a sight of a ship; any kind, really, as long as it wasn't another marine vessel and it came within the hour. Then, the door slammed open and I had no choice but to slide back down onto the cold floor and act like I had been in that very position for ages.

I really, really hoped my plan pulled through. If not, I was toast.

It wasn't until about a half hour later did the cannons start firing, battle cries filling the air. I jumped up from my spot on the ground just as the patrol guards did, hefting their cutlasses securely in their hands and hoofing it up the stairs.

Ha, idiots.

Reaching into my pants band – yeah, you heard right; frankly, my breasts are too small to hide stuff in – I pulled out a miniature broom. And by miniature, I mean _mini_ature, as in ant-sized. But that's all part of my power. I ate a fruit, you see. The Shrink-Shrink Fruit. You can probably deduce what I can do from that. It's how I'd had the weapon needed to make the peephole earlier.

I cupped the broom in my hands, before opening them. The more I widened the distance between my two hands, the longer the broom got, until it stopped growing altogether, back to its original size. On my hands and knees, I crawled over to the edge of the cell. The broom had a bit of a curve to the end, and I used that to raise my keys off the hook. Bingo. I unlocked the metal door quickly, shrinking the broom and placing it back to the waistband of my yoga pants.

And, just for the heck of it, I tossed the rest of the keys in the remaining cells. The prisoners gaped up at me. I shrugged.

"What? I need a distraction." I grinned. "Now, I believe the correct response is, 'Thank you, Miss Sadie'."

* * *

The ship was…interesting.

The deck was stained red – I'm guessing not from paint – and the ship itself a nice mahogany colour. It had some sort of metal, punk rock-ish theme going on, and a skull was implanted on the side of the deck. I recognized the Jolly Roger with the Glasgow smile easily. The Kidd Pirates. It was just my luck that my saviours – whether they wanted to be or not – were the most ruthless rookie crew of the Grand Line.

How smashing.

The prisoners I released were doing a fair good job of terrorizing the marines, and that on top of the pirate attack was working ever increasingly in my favour. I calculated the distance between the marine vessel and Kidd's ship quickly. In about three minutes, they would be close enough for me to jump. I would just have to tough it out until then.

Suddenly, a loud bang was heard and a cannonball soared towards us. The cannon hit its mark, catching the marine ship squarely in the middle of the deck. Whoever the sniper was on that ship was pretty darn good, and _not _just because I couldn't even heft a gun up long enough to aim. I had wimpy noodle arms, but in my defense I was in pretty good shape. Well, not really. But I _looked _like I was in shape, and that was good enough for me.

One more minute…I dodged a marine that barreled into my path, unable to contain the shriek that built up inside of me. My grandma always told me I sounded like a squawking bird when I did that. Oh, how I love her. A man suddenly blocked my view and I shoved his head aside. Good thing he was already unconscious. Thirty seconds…

_Now_!

I took a running momentum, jumping poised on the railing before kicking off again. I was airborne for maybe a few seconds –_ agonizing_ seconds – before landing on the red-stained deck of the Kidd Pirates. Luckily, no one had seen me – yet. Everyone was too busy barking orders or sending cannons flying that they didn't notice the lone girl sneaking into the place where they kept food and such. The point was: I was the only girl within hordes of men. And no one noticed.

Huh. I think I'm a little insulted.

I reached the hidey-hole place and crouched down next to a barrel of rum, the ring of battle cries still in the air. I yawned. If the Kidd Pirates were even one tenth of what the marines made them out to be, then they would come out on top in no time.

But for now… I felt my eyelids become heavier. The sack of potatoes nearby looked extremely comfortable all of a sudden. Now that the adrenaline had worn off, all that time spent staying up at night, looking through the porthole and then when the ship had arrived had left me completely drained. Maybe just a little nap would do. Hopefully, I'd stay undiscovered until when I awoke.

But then again, luck was never usually on my side.


	2. Chapter 2

Just a heads up: if it's in Kidd's POV, it's in third person. If it's in Sadie's POV, it's in first person. Kidd won't get much POV time, though. And he might be a bit OOC in this one, but it's for humour purposes. Sorry this is so short, next one will be uber long to make up for it!

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Disclaimer: I do not own One Piece.

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**Chaper Two: Acceptance Couldn't be Cuter**

Honestly, Kidd didn't get surprised very often. He'd been through a lot. Encountering a horde of Sea Kings? Big deal. Taking on several marine vessels at once? Child's play. He was, however, not ready, not even close, for the sight of the sleeping _girl_ all cozied up on his sack of potatoes the moment he entered the ship's hold in search for a light snack.

His _sack_ of _potatoes_! Everyone knew that Kidd loved his potatoes. So why was some wench snuggled up against it like she owned it or something? On second thought, who the hell _was_ she? Unless Doc had finally decided to give up his manhood and had turned himself into a girl – though Kidd doubted that even if he did, he'd look as good as the one before him – then the wench was definitely not a part of his crew. He would have noticed. Really.

Gah, he needed to get laid.

But seriously: back to the matter at hand. Kidd rubbed at his eyes – just to make sure. For all he knew, he could have gotten scurvy or the like and was having hallucinations. But no, the blonde wench was still there, sleeping away, looking the picture of innocence. Not that Kidd particularly cared. Innocent or not, she wasn't getting any less of his wrath.

He grimaced. He really needed some fucking coffee. Or potatoes. He could go for some potatoes – if only some girl wasn't all up in his potato sack's grill. Like seriously! He turned his back for one second and look where it got him…

But he was getting off track. Growling, Kidd toed the girl none too gently in the ribs. It seemed the wench was a light sleeper, thank the heavens, as she bolted upright immediately. Her hand went to her hair, combing it out. Women.

"What the hell? Cool your cheese, grandma."

"What did you say?" Kidd scowled. Who did she think she was, telling him to _cool _his _cheese_? And calling him _grandma_, no less? No, he didn't think he would. Cool his cheese, that is. He didn't even like cheese. Potatoes, on the other hand…

Blonde Chick tilted her eyes upward and froze abruptly upon seeing Kidd looming over her, eyes narrowed. "Shit," she cursed, looking scared. And she was right in feeling so. She _should_ be scared. Kidd just brought out the worst in people, he supposed.

And he was damn good at it, too.

* * *

Holy. Shit.

It was all I could think as Eustass _freaking_ Kidd and I had this whole staring contest going on – only a lot more intense that your average, run-of-the-mill competition. As in, one small movement and I could very well kiss the earth goodbye. "Ha-ha, well, hi there Mister Eustass…How's your day so far?" Okay, enough chit-chat. "Please don't kill me."

Well, that seemed to catch him off guard – only for a moment, though. His lips soon curled into a devious grin – they were purple, by the way. The hell? – and his hand shot out, fast as lightning to grab my arm and haul me up into a standing position.

But seriously though. Was this Eustass Kidd? He looked clown-ier than he had in his wanted poster. Bright red hair (that inexplicably defied the rules of gravity) and dark red rimmed eyes, purple tinted lips…_This_ man was worth one-o-one million beli? Then again, he did look a little intimidating. A little. Mostly, he looked like a clown. Eustass raised a brow, very faint but still there as I not-so-subtly eyed him.

His own eyes narrowed. "Who are you? How did you get here? Do you know where you are? Do you know who _I _am?"

Well, considering I'd called him 'Mister Eustass' not a moment ago, "Um…yes? I mean no!" I amended at his glare, "I mean…whatever the right answer is?"

Eustass sneered down at me and raised his first – I cringed, waiting for impact – but out of nowhere, this guy in a mask flashed into the room and managed to somehow stop Kidd from smashing me into oblivion. I recognized him as 'Massacre Soldier' Killer, Kidd's first mate. Massacre Dude placed a hand on his captain's shoulder and the result was so instantaneous that it was almost _cute_. Kidd's muscles relaxed slightly, and he lowered his hand.

But I was still on edge. One wrong word and I was toast.

"Are you a cross dresser?" I blurted, before blinking and inwardly cursing myself. Okay, I swear I didn't mean to say that – I mean, I was thinking it, but I didn't mean to say it. Shit. But in all honesty, it's plausible. He certainly _looked_ like one. Sort of. Kind of.

Just a tad.

"Excuse me?" Eustass growled. His grip on my arm tightened. "What did you call me?"

"Ow ow ow ow um…the manliest man in all of the Grand Line?" I tried, too busy on loosening his grip. It seriously hurt. I was never good with pain. "Ow ow ow."

"Humph." Kidd pushed me back with a scowl, his purple lips curved downwards. Phew. It was a good thing Mr. Eustass seemed to not understand sarcasm. "What are you doing here? Who are you? What is your purpose?" Again, the questions were fired at a rapid pace.

I was too terrified to think of anything remotely witty to say. So, I just told the truth. "I was escaping from the marine vessel you fought earlier – how long have I been asleep, anyway? – and my name is Sadie Hawkins my purpose is to get away from the marines which you helped me with thank you for that by the way," I took a deep breath, "And I would really appreciate it if you'd let me stay at least until the next island I would be eternally grateful oh and I like your goggles. Really." I added. It couldn't hurt to be a suck up. Plus, his goggles_ were_ kind of cool.

"Repeat that again," Eustass said with a dangerous edge to his voice, "And this time, fuckin' slowly."

"I – I…escaped from the marines you fought earlier," I started tentatively.

"Continue," Kidd gritted impatiently. "You said your name was…?"

"Sadie," I supplied meekly, "Sadie Hawkins."

"'Sorceress' Sadie Hawkins, according to her wanted poster," Killer, who had been silent until now, cut in smoothly, "She's worth twenty-three million beli. A Revolutionary."

Kidd's eyes narrowed as he scrutinized me rather crudely, raking his eyes down my body and back up again. I shivered despite myself, but tensed to lessen what was visible to the two pirates. "A Revolutionary, huh?" he sneered unnecessarily. "Tell me, Hawkins, what are you doing here on my ship, exactly?"

I'd already told him earlier, but I bit my tongue and answered dutifully instead. "I escaped from the marine vessel earlier today. When you fought, it was the perfect opportunity." I hesitated, just for show. "I don't suppose you could use a part-time scout for your crew, could you?" The answering look I received dashed all my hopes instantly.

"Actually…" Killer started, his tone contemplative yet neutral from behind his white-and-blue mask.

Once again, it was sort of cute how Kidd turned to regard his first mate rather seriously, then back to me, seemingly in a new light. "Actually, what?"

Killer stayed silent, and Eustass seemed to get visibly impatient. Just when I thought the captain would burst from the suspense, the masked blonde spoke. "How exactly did you receive the title of 'Sorceress'?" Killer asked, the question directed to me. His tone was calm but there was a curious edge to it.

I blinked, taken aback by the inquiry. "Well, as long as you promise not to blab to any marines, I'll tell you."

Kidd snorted but otherwise stayed quiet, and I realised how stupid my compromise had been. Why would pirates even be conversing with marines in the first place? Killer didn't bother to reply, and I could almost imagine him rolling his eyes behind that mask of his. "I ate the Shrink-Shrink Fruit," I confessed lightly, running a hand through my hair once more, "It allows me to, obviously, shrink any object to the size of an ant."

"Can you shrink humans?" the question was asked after a short pause in which my declaration sunk in.

"No," I replied without hesitation, "It only works for objects; no animals, no people. And they have to be a reasonable size, like I'm not going to be shrinking marine ships left and right." I left out the fact that I kept all my cargo in the band of my pants. There was a small pocket sewn to the inside for the purpose, safe from the naked eye, and_ I_ certainly wasn't going to spill all my secrets to _pirates_.

Killer grunted in response, indicating he'd heard me, but didn't say any more. After a moment, Kidd spoke up with a frown. "Should I toss her overboard?" He appeared to be talking to himself, because he answered his own question a second later. "Yeah, I should."

Eyes wide, I was about to defend myself when Killer cut in calmly. "Maybe she could be of some use to us, Kidd." Saved by the first mate: score!

"How so?" Kidd looked me over with a small sneer, "She looks scrawny, and weak."

"Don't hold back," I muttered, but was ignored.

"Her Devil Fruit…it certainly is interesting. Maybe one day it could help us somehow. You could use her Fruit however you want." Killer said. I couldn't help but be impressed. Killer was making it sound like a mere suggestion. That way, Kidd would think it was his own idea to let me – hopefully – stay for a while. What a smart cookie! What an intelligent biscuit! What a clever cracker! What a…well you get the idea. Killer was cunnning. And while I was sure he didn't have any evil intentions against his captain, and that Kidd had a functioning brain of his own, I was nonetheless impressed.

"You could be right…" Kidd mused after a while. "I could use her to my advantage."

I have said it twice and I'll say it again: it was kind of cute, how Eustass' first mate could bend his captain's decisions so easily. The _real_ dangerous one to look out for was Killer here. Kidd was just a big, old, softie.

I hoped.


	3. Chapter 3

So, thanks again for the reviews guys; I really appreciate them. I hope you like this chapter and that it isn't too...I don't know, weird? Warning: a bit of vulgarity in this one. Sorry, but it's Kidd, what do you expect? Oh, and if Kidd seems a bit out of character or lenient in this chapter, the next will make up for it, ha-ha.

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Disclaimer: I do not own One Piece.

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**Chapter Three: Get With the Program**

"So…this is awkward." I pursed my lips before making this little smacking noise that echoed through the room a bit. Then I did it again. And again. And again. I really hated silences, and the tension in the room was thick enough to cut shapes out with a knife.

I was currently in the Kidd Pirate's mess hall, and that would be totally fine if it weren't jam packed with a dead silent crew. Oh, and did I mention that they were all staring? Well, they were. At. _Me_.

I mean, sure, Kidd – or, at least, Killer – had told the rest of the crew about me joining them. Apparently, it was a pretty big deal because I would be the first female Kidd Pirate to date. Which meant that I would be trapped in a boat, unable to escape, filled to the brim with hulking masses of pure testosterone. I guess I was okay with that, though – Killer had warned the rest that they weren't to touch me, and it seemed everyone listened to him well enough.

But that didn't mean they had to be friendly. Or talkative. They definitely weren't a talkative bunch, but I suspected that it was only around me. Gah. Kidd should've just killed me and have been done with it. Anything would be better than this…this _stillness_.

"Dray. Coffee. Now." I blinked at the new voice and whipped around – I was seated at a table, alone might I add, and facing away from the set of double doors leading into the mess hall – and saw Eustass walk in half-hazardously, like he was drunk or something. Dray, the ship's cook, was already moving forward with a mug of what I assumed to be the drink Kidd had demanded, and handed the coffee to his captain without another word. He walked off after that. It seemed that this was a routinely thing.

I watched as Eustass drank the hot beverage in quick gulps, ignoring the heat licking down his throat. The rest of the crew watched me as I watched their captain. My eye ticked, but it wasn't out of annoyance at the Kidd Pirate's antics; rather, it was out of disbelief.

Because Eustass 'Captain' Kidd…was naked.

…

WAIT. That came out wrong. So, so wrong. Get your mind out of the _gutter_ people. I didn't mean naked as in "without clothes," but naked as in he wasn't wearing all that clashing-colours hoopla he always seemed to don.

Instead of his over-the-top clothes, he wore a simple black shirt that stretched over his broad chest and a pair of gray sweats. That gosh-awful coat of his was no where to be found. Neither were his painted fingernails. His gravity-defying hair was still sticking up rebelliously, though.

But that was beside the _point_! The thing was, he looked…normal. Almost nice-looking, I suppose. Handsome, even. I didn't understand why he had to wear all of his overzealous attire in the first place, because without it…Okay, I had to stop this mad, mad thinking. At once. But he looked so – stop. What was I thinking?

"Wench." The voice broke in through my inner battle when I heard Kidd speak to me gruffly. I pulled my gaze from Kidd's just-woken hair and down to his red-tinted eyes, pursing my lips in slight annoyance at being addressed so callously.

"What?" I groused out.

Kidd's eyes narrowed, and I gulped inaudibly. Eustass must be able to smell fear or something, because his lips curved into a satisfied sneer a moment later. Meep.

"Your job is to keep watch. Mike will tell you when it's lunch, but until then, don't leave your post." He paused, mulling over his words. "Or I'll cut your pretty little head off," he added, evidently deciding that he wasn't being harsh enough.

I had to have the last word. "You think my head is pretty?" I asked, all oh-look-there's-a-halo-on-my-head. And stuff.

Kidd growled, choosing to ignore me. But I think he only decided to spare my life because of Dray, who had set down a plate of hash browns before Kidd, right on time, it seemed. I owed him one. "Well, what are you waiting for?" He asked between bites, barely sparing me a glance. "Get to work, wench!"

I hated when he called me that. I stood from my chair abruptly, again ignoring all the stares I accumilated. "Of course," I smiled sweetly.

Ass.

* * *

It had been so long since the last island, Kidd mused irritably. He nursed his third cup of coffee in his office, going over scriptures and whatnot about the next island they were thought to stop at. Hey, he was captain, and in charge of the lives of all his men. It helped to know a little about the dangers they could possibly be facing.

Not that Kidd had any doubts about getting out alive. Heh, no. It was just a precautionary.

Honestly though, Kidd hated that he had to follow and cater to the Log Pose's every whim. Where the needle pointed, he went. It wasn't supposed to be like that. He was a pirate; a free spirit! He should've been going where he pleased, not following a stupid glass compass.

It didn't help that he hadn't been laid in over a month.

Kidd's mouth tightened into a straight line. The wench, Sadie, definitely wasn't helping his problem. So he was attracted to her. It didn't matter, because he absolutely refused to stoop so low as to go to her to satisfy his…needs.

Her boobs were small, anyway.

Kidd heard the door to his office open suddenly, and he paused a beat before continuing to read. "Killer," he addressed his first mate without looking up from a scroll written in ancient writing. "What do you want?"

"The island has been spotted. It's maybe an hour away." Killer said, his answer as short and clipped as possible.

That caused Kidd to stop and look up. "Finally," he grumbled. "Tell Dray to send up some celebratory mashed potatoes. With gravy." He added, stretching in his chair.

Killer nodded his assent, closing the door behind him. Kidd cracked his neck from side to side before standing and following his first mate out the door. He would see how his newest scout was doing before eating, and maybe even find a way for her to stop being so alluring, to him anyway. Perhaps Doc could re-arrange her face a little.

Yeah, that sounded decent. Kidd smirked. Sometimes, he amazed even himself with his genius ideas.

"Captain," Mike, the navigator, greeted him from his place at the ship's helm.

Kidd grunted. "How's everything going?"

"There are a few coral reefs lying around, but I should be able to navigate around them. We'll dock in about fifty minutes." Mike paused to hand a pair of binoculars to his captain.

Kidd took it and held it up to his eyes. An island with much foliage greeted him, looking quite similar to the pictures he'd just been studying in his office. Rain Dance Island, it was called. Notorious for its deadly creatures lurking in the dark, and never-ending rainfall. Even now, Kidd could see a heavy, gray cloud hovering over the island. Thunder flashed and illuminated the place, the darkness a stark contrast to the blue sky and fluffy white clouds currently bathing the Kidd Pirate's ship in light.

Kidd handed the binoculars back to Mike, crossing his arms over his broad chest. "Where's the girl?" He asked, upon remembering why he'd come out on deck in the first place.

"Oh, her. She's up on the crow's nest, cap'n." The navigator replied, tossing his long black braid over his shoulder as he made a sharp right. Kidd uncrossed his arms and gripped the side of the ship to keep his footing, before nodding at Mike shortly.

Kidd stepped on a metal plate right next to the crow's nest, willing his powers to hoist himself up to the girl's level. His arms were one more crossed over his chest in a no-nonsense manner. She better be working hard, he thought to himself irritably. Just _picturing_ the girl and her soft, light blonde hair was aggravating in itself. At least she managed to piss him off every time she opened her mouth, so he could focus on that instead.

"The hell?" Kidd murmured, now right next to the opening in the crow's nest.

The wench was lying on her back, her bare feet splayed on the side of the mahogany-coloured wood. Her shoulder-length hair tumbled every which way, and her eyes were closed.

Was she_ sleeping_? Kidd would kill her. He would cut off her head. He would–

"Did you need something, captain?"

Sadie's eyes opened slowly, showcasing the clear blue of her irises. Her lips quirked upwards, but she tamed the expression a second later.

Kidd narrowed his eyes. "Yes. Why aren't you working?"

"I am." Sadie raised an eyebrow. "I found the island and now my job is done."

The wench really knew nothing about being a scout, did she? "Your job isn't done yet. Be on the lookout for marines or other pirates."

"Oh." She sat upright, pursing her lips to the side. "Well, I don't want to keep watch anymore. Can't I have a more interesting job?"

Kidd wasn't against violence to women, but the girl looked like she could barely throw a punch. Plus, she had an interesting Devil Fruit and it would be wise to keep her around for a while more. His arms bulged under the strain of not to make contact of her face with his fist.

"No."

Sadie opened her mouth to retort, but tensed her jaw when she saw the murderous look in Kidd's eyes. "Okay," she agreed meekly, and a superior feeling washed over him. Maybe he should have her make him a sandwich.

Nah, too overused. A baked potato, maybe. Hmm. That reminded him of the mashed potatoes with gravy waiting for him back at his office. He was sure Dray had made his impromptu order already.

"Get ready to go on the island." Kidd ordered, thoughts filled with potatoes drowning in gravy, "And wear a raincoat."

And cover up all that skin.

* * *

Eustass was wearing his extravaganza outfit once more. I wrinkled my nose at the sight.

It definitely didn't suit him, although now that I'd seen him without it, the eccentric pants and whatnot seemed a bit more normal. When I looked at Kidd, it was like he'd been merged with his captain image and his morning image.

And damn, that image was pretty darn attractive.

Moving on.

It was raining. And by raining, I mean hardcore someone-dumped-a-bucket-of-water-on-me raining. Plus, the raincoat didn't help much; I was still drenched head to toe and probably looked like a drowned cat.

I hate cats.

"How long do we have to be here for?" I mumbled irritably. The whole island seemed to be lacking in civilization despite Kidd's claims that there were, so all hopes of contacting Lyron, a guy in my field who owed me a favour, were dashed instantly. It seemed like I'd have to stick with the Kidd pirates for a while more, at least until the next island.

"Shut up," was Eustass' oh-so-witty reply, too distracted to rip my throat out. His gravity-defying hair was plastered to his skull, and his clothes (he'd left his cloak on board and instead wore a bright yellow shirt) stuck to him like a second skin. It was pretty hard not to stare. While Killer was lithe in frame, Eustass was, well, more well-built. And his arms were…ahem, attractive.

Gah. Why did he have to have such nice arms? Did he _know_ they were my weakness or something? How evil of him.

"There should be a village up ahead," Kidd called to the people of his crew that he had selected to join him on the island. Unfortunately, that included me, for some reason. Something about keeping an eye on me.

Pfft. Yeah. Okay.

A flash of thunder illuminated our grim faces. Well, aside from Killer. My bet was that his mask would fill up and he'd drown in no time.

I don't know how long we trudged through the thick foliage before it started to thin out. Soon enough, a quaint little village came into view and I nearly sighed in relief at the sight. Shelter! Finally.

Now, all we had to do was stay at the village (and maybe do a little exploring) until the log pose set in. Then we could leave. And the sooner we left, the sooner we'd get to the next island (possibly with means of communication) and the sooner we got to the next island, the sooner I could be free of Kidd's annoyingly attractive clutches!

I hummed, now in better spirits. "Hey Captain, aren't you going to knock on the door – holy _shit_ why are you guys terrorising the village!"

* * *

I sulked, cradling a pack of ice in my hands. "Thanks," I muttered dejectedly to Dray, who simply nodded and whisked back to the kitchen.

I heard a snort from across me. Kidd asked, "What? What's with that look? Did you think we came to the island to play nice and make some new friends?" He snorted again.

Whipping my head up, I glared at Eustass, who returned my look coolly. We engaged in a heated stare down, until I looked away in slight shame _–_ and because his look was sca_ry_. "Well, I guess I was expecting you'd do that," I finally admitted.

Because I did. I was a Revolutionary, wasn't I? It was basically my job, my _life_, to collect and learn information on not only the World Government, but on many pirates too. Naturally, I'd heard great rumours of the Eustass Pirate's blood lust. I had sort of seen it coming; still, I'd been shocked. Not because I hadn't seen such carnage before, but because I was usually on the sidelines, plotting instead of (sort of, not really) fighting alongside the rest of them. I just didn't fight. Not because I didn't want to, but because I couldn't. I was about as useful on the battle field as a wimpy piece of string.

Which was exactly why I sported a nasty black eye, given to me by a panicking villager whose fist had oh-so-conveniently been near. My. Face.

I slapped the bag of ice over said eye.

Kidd looked amused at my response. "Then if you were expecting it, why the long face? You look like I killed your grandma or something." Eustass cackled at his own joke.

That set me off. "Grandma!" I wailed, "All the elderly! Kill the parents; fine! Kill the kids, whatever! But the elders? Really?"

Okay, so I sounded a bit heartless there. I _did_ care about the parents and the kids, but my one, true soft spot lay with sweet, loving old people. Well okay, not _my_ grandma. She was a reckless old biddy, and the only exception. I meant normal grandparents. They were just too cute!

"Do you have some sick fetish for old people, Hawkins?"

"No!" I yelped, flushing despite how abso-freaking-lutely cold I was. "Get your mind out of the gutter, Eustass! I just like elders, okay?"

Kidd glared at me some, before snorting and rolling his eyes to the sky – or the ceiling of the mess hall. "Whatever. As long as you don't mess up any of our raids, I don't care."

"Fine," I muttered childishly, "_Don't_ care; see if I give a hoot."

"Fine."

"_Fine_."

"Fuck you."

"Fine."

"Shut _up_."

"Fine."

"_Hawkins_."

"Shutting up."


	4. Chapter 4

Hi guys! Thanks again for all the comments, sorry for the language in this one. Now, on to the newest chapter!

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Disclaimer: I do not own One Piece.

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**Chapter Four: One Greedy Captain**

"Kidd." A hefty pause. "Wake up."

_Grunt_. "Bastard. Let me sleep."

"You've got mail."

Another long pause. "That's what you woke me up for? I'll kill you, bitch!"

"Your bounty's been raised."

Kidd shot up straight in bed, eyes snapping open though the irises still took time to adjust to the light. "Shit man, why didn't you just say so in the first place?" he rasped.

Killer didn't respond, instead holding out a bundle of papers for Kidd to leaf through. Kidd cackled sleepily upon seeing his new bounty. Killer's had been raised as well. "I fucking rule," he boasted half-heartedly, still not yet fully awake.

"Check the last page."

"Hm?" Kidd complied, too out of it to respond with his usual, "Don't tell me what to do, idiot!" (Of course, he would end up doing what Killer had said anyway, but that was beside the point.) "Last page, last page, last page…Here. Eustass Kidd…terrorised village…harboring a fugitive Revolutionary with top-secret government documents…no survivors…bounty raised – _hold the fuck on_." Kidd backtracked wildly, eyes honing in on a specific sentence. "Fugitive Revolutionary with top-secret_ government_ documents? What the fuck? How the fuck? Sadie fuck?"

Kidd continued swearing, uncaring if he was waking his whole crew by now. The freaking wench had government material, and now they were after _his_ crew because she was on it?

_Hell._

* * *

_Gurgle. Gurgle._

Sadie spluttered, trying to force as much air into her lungs as possible. "I'm sorry!" she cried, before she was dunked into the freezing cold ocean again, suspended by a single metal cuff attached to her ankle. _Gurgle. Gurgle. _"Stop!"

"Wench," Kidd sneered, maneuvering his hand so that she raised up against the side of his boat upside-down, until they were seeing eye to eye. "You left out a very vital part of your story, didn't you?" He shook his hand, shaking her as a result. "Where is it? Where is this so-called government document?"

"Lost it," Sadie gasped, "When I was coming to your ship. They think I still have it."

"I don't know why I've even gone so long without punishing you," Kidd went on, ignoring her statement, though he had heard her. "I should have killed you on day one."

"Don't–" _Gurgle. Gurgle. _Kidd could practically see Sadie run out of energy, the ocean's will completely draining her. _Gurgle. Gurgle._

Kidd raised his arm one last time, ready to plunge her into the sea for good. He laughed maniacally.

"Kidd." The unexpected voice caused him to veer Sadie sharply to the left. She hit the side of the boat with a sickening thud.

"Oh, fuck!" he snarled, whirling around to face Killer with an annoyed look on his face. "What is it?" Kidd hissed. "She's of no use to us. Screw her Devil Fruit."

Killer nodded his masked head in agreement, aware that Kidd was close to snapping. "True, but think about it. She's actually done you a favour."

A favour? Kidd scoffed. "What are you fucking talking about?"

"She's brought even more attention to our crew. And the publicity can very well raise our bounties higher," Killer pointed out neutrally.

This caused Kidd to pause, his arm still suspended mid-air. "Yeah," he said slowly, "That's fucking true." He could see it now: millions of fleet ships would be sent after his boat, in search of a document they didn't even have anymore. They were strong. They could take out the Marines, easy. And if it got his crew into a threatening position, he could just hand them the girl and none would be the wiser.

Well, of course they'd still try to catch his crew afterwards, but whatever. He was Eustass fucking Kidd! He could handle anything that came his way.

"Hmm." Kidd raised his hand. Sadie dragged upwards by her ankle, battered and bruised and cut in several places. "Wench. You alive?"

She groaned.

"Good." Kidd tossed her onto the deck. "You listen here, Hawkins. You're going to do what I say, exactly when I say it. You will cause no trouble for us on this boat.

"And," he smirked smugly, "you'll raise our bounties while you're at it."

* * *

I lied. When I told Kidd that I didn't have the document anymore – I lied.

Sneaking around my small as heck room (previously a closet, but at least I wasn't forced to sleep with hundreds of testosterone filled men) I slipped a hand under my pillow (which lay across a bunch of potato sacks – the ship had lots of those) and felt around for a bit. My fingers encountered a couple small objects, until I just _knew_ that I'd touched the right thing, probably another effect of my Devil Fruit. I slipped out a miniature wad of paper.

The government document.

In all honesty, I didn't know why they were all hyped up about it. All I'd done was steal them off a Marine captain's desk. Were they really that important? I returned the documents to normal size, flipped through the pages, but all that greeted me were symbols of some kind. The Marine's secret language.

Unluckily for them, the Revolutionarys had quite a few people who could decode it. Unluckily for _me_, I wasn't one of them. So I had no idea of figuring out what exactly was so special about the document until I could contact some of my comrades.

Right now, though, I was just happy to be alive. Because if I said that I wasn't afraid of Eustass, that would be complete bull. Oddly enough, when he was on board, he wasn't all that scary. But when his rage was directed to me, I practically wet my pants.

But _any_way, the news article could actually work in my favour. Now that word was out that I was on Eustass' ship, surely some of the revolutionarys I was closer with would come to my rescue. Hopefully.

I sighed, before wincing when it caused me to hurt, well, everywhere. Standing up to the tips of my toes, I hid the minimized government document in a crack in the wall. I would have to remember that for when I needed it.

And just in time, too, because a throat cleared as soon as I retracted my hand. I turned around in slight surprise. It hurt to move. "Killer."

"Come with me," the masked man said, "I'll take you to Doc."

I paused, eyeing the lackey he had brought with him and contemplating this. Sure, Killer had saved me, but I knew that he didn't do it for me. Finally, I nodded wearily. "Yeah, okay."

"Wait. Upturn your pocket."

My eyes narrowed instinctively._ What?_ Then, I realised that he probably wanted to search me for the government document. He didn't trust me, not that I blamed him. He was a smart man.

Thank the heavens I'd hidden it in time. "Fine," I said shortly, dumping all the items in my hidden pocket onto my makeshift bed. I made a whole show of wiggling the upturned pocket around, making sure Killer saw the whole thing, before I was satisfied.

"Alright. Bring me to the Doc," I said in confidence.

Killer turned to the lower-ranking pirate and said, "Search for the document. Bring anything that looks suspicious to me." The lackey nodded, and then Killer inclined his head in my direction.

"Come."

* * *

Doc was a nightmare.

That was his actual name, too, or at least, what he insisted I call him. _Doc_. He wore a frilly shirt and inhumanely tight pants, and his feminine features were caked in makeup. His voice, however, was as low as Kidd's, and his body twice as thick. The transition was more than a little creepy, and just a tad bit funny.

What. The. Hell.

"Alright, dah-ling," Doc said, though the manly voice sounded off coming from such a feminine face, "Now, tell me when it hurts, okay?"

"It hurts," I said automatically.

Doc blinked his long lashes. "But I haven't even done anything yet."

I grimaced. "Sorry. I don't do pain well."

Doc laughed, clapping me on the back while he did so. Ow, ow, ow. "Sadie, right? Don't worry, it'll feel like I'm giving a you massage, really! I've been told I have the hands of a goddess."

_By who?! _I wanted to scream. Instead, I smiled stiffly and braced myself for the pain. Those hands of Doc's looked like they could snap tree trunks in half, and his arms _looked _like tree trunks.

Doc started by prodding along the length of my arms, and whenever he hit a bruise, it throbbed under his touch. I let out a pitiful wimper every time, and when he heard me, he'd chuckle and trill a "sorry!" before moving on.

After the examination, I was given a bottle of cream for my wounds, with a, "you're lucky you're still alive, dah-ling! If Kidd had gone all out, you wouldn't live to see daylight!"

_That_ wasn't all-out for Kidd?! So Eustass was actually stronger that I'd experienced?! I nearly fainted as it dawned on me. If Kidd ever found out that I still had the document on me, I was dead meat. And even then, I definitely wasn't on the captain's good side.

Looked like I'd have to suck it up, and begin schmoozing the incorrigible captain.

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**I know I don't ever do authour notes at the end of chapters, but this is pretty important. I won't be updating _at all_ in the month of November, because I'm doing NaNoWriMo. Perhaps you've heard of it. Basically, I have to write a novel in 30 days. So I won't have time to update, sorry!**

**I'll see you all in December! Have a wonderful Halloween!**


	5. Chapter 5

SURPRISE! :D I'm back early! (I'm still doing NaNoWriMo, I just felt like writing BoW.) As a reward for my efforts, it would be cool if you reviewed! I'm super nervous about this chapter. Sorry for the shortness, but I'm still doing NaNo so I don't really have time for a longer one... :)

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Disclaimer: I do not own One Piece.

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**Chapter Five: Pandemonium**

"Hey Captain, I like your hair today! Very, err, gravity-defying."

Eustass didn't even bother to give me a look that screamed "you're a weirdo" like he had the first time I'd complimented him. It had been around three weeks since getting thrown around like a rag doll by Kidd, and ever since then, I'd been complimenting him, getting him potatoes, and performing my "lookout" duties to the best of my ability. I didn't even fall asleep on the job anymore!

Why? Because I had to.

Let me elaborate: Kidd was strong, there was no doubt about it. He could snap me like a twig if he really wanted to. The only thing that was keeping me alive at this point was the hypothetical bounty on my head, ensuring that the marines would be after me and keeping tabs on the Kidd Pirates. (And thus raising their bounties in the process.) As a result, until I could either, a) escape, or b) find a fellow Revolutionary, I had to keep myself alive. Which involved not getting Kidd mad. Which involved complimenting him.

At least, that was how my logic played out in my head.

Besides, if I could worm my way into Eustass' inner circle, there was a chance that my death would hurt less if the Kidd Pirates found out that I'd had the government document all along. And thus, The Plan.

"Captain, you look like you could use some potatoes. Want me to get you some?"

Kidd barely looked up from his paperwork. "Hawkins, get out."

I saluted, the effort of keeping a smile on my face getting harder by the seconds. "Yes, sir!"

As I made to leave, Kidd paused and set down his writing utensil. "Wait." He looked up, and I slowly turned to face him, dread forming in my stomach. What the hell did he want from me?

"Can I help you, Captain?"

"Yeah," Kidd glared at me, "Hawkins, I want you to stop doing whatever you're doing. It's annoying."

I blinked slowly, innocently. "What_ am_ I doing, sir?"

"You know," Kidd gestured wildly before tugging a hand through his hair, probably to let out all that pent up aggression, "being nice and stuff. Do you _want_ me to hurt you?"

Wait, he wanted to hurt me for being nice? Did that mean my plan was a bust? I mulled it over in my head for a moment, before looking at Kidd. He seemed ready to strangle me. I frowned. "Well, forgive me for trying to get in my captain's good books."

He let out a short bark of laughter. "Is that what you were doing? Hawkins, my grandma could do better than that."

I scowled. "Considering you kill grandmas, how would you even know?" As soon as I'd said the words, I wished I could take it back. That was seriously going too far.

But Eustass only smirked, lazily reclining in his chair. "Good one," he allowed. I narrowed my eyes in return, but on the inside, I was relieved to be able to stop pretending that I actually liked his crazy wild hair. I didn't have to get his potatoes anymore, even though I would miss pinching off the sides to eat.

Kidd resumed reading his papers. "Now go do your job before I make you do it," he drawled.

* * *

Going over the details for the next island they were estimated to stop at, Kidd suddenly let out a breath of disbelieving laughter. So that was what the girl Hawkins was doing all this time. Trying to kiss up to him. It made sense in a twisted kind of way, but Kidd was just glad that it was over. Her compliments that she clearly didn't mean and her fake little smile was beginning to get to his nerves.

Plus, she probably didn't realise it, but the look she'd give him when she was trying not to twitch an eye (from lying so often) was rather enticing. She was doing things to him that he didn't have the willpower for. He hadn't gotten laid in months. Months! Every male should be sympathetic to his situation.

"Kidd."

He grunted, looking up from the little spot he was burning a hole into on his desk. "Whaddya want, Killer?"

"Mike says we're going to be arriving at the next island in a little over an hour."

Kidd nodded, already closing his books and gathering together his papers. "Alright. Get the message out. Tell everyone to be ready by then."

Killer made a sound of consent, before stepping back out of Kidd's office and closing the door behind him. Kidd listened to the sounds of his first mate leave, the footsteps nearly inaudible. After putting his books away, he maneuvered around his desk and stepped outside, before walking briskly down the hall. When he turned into the next set of doors, he stopped by one, hearing strange sounds coming from behind the wood.

Frowning, Kidd strained his ears. Was that...singing he heard?

Without any regards for privacy, Kidd barged into the room, stopping in his tracks when he drank in the sight before him: a scantily clad, singing Sadie Hawkins. He blinked once, twice.

"What the hell?" Sadie exclaimed, stopping her singing, "Privacy much?"

* * *

The nerve of him! I tugged the hem of my tank top over my shorts, only that caused more cleavage to show, not that I had much in the first place. I pursed my lips together to stop from scowling. I'd changed only because I was going to take a quick nap and didn't want to be uncomfortable. I certainly didn't expect Kidd to show up, uninvited might I add.

"What do you need?" I frowned, refraining from the urge to cover my arms over my stomach. "I was going to take a nap."

Kidd didn't answer, instead travelling his gaze up and down my body. I let out the scowl I'd been holding in, even as warmth crept up my neck. Why the hell was he looking at me like...that?

I opened my mouth to berate him more, but I didn't get the chance. In one swift stride across my small as hell room, Eustass reached behind me and grabbed a fistful of my hair, tilting my head up with the rough movement. I cried out, mostly from the unexpectedness of the gesture. I looked up at him through squinted eyes. Then Eustass did something even more unexpected.

Fingers still tangled in my hair, firm on my scalp, he pulled my head forward and kissed me, hard. My pulse began thrumming in my ears and I was only barely aware of kissing him back, standing up on the tips of my toes for better access. Kidd snaked an arm around my waist, hauling me against his body. He kissed me again, for the briefest of moments, before pulling back. We were both breathing heavily. I stared at him, trying to convey my message of _what the hell did we just do? _Then, his upper lip curled, and he looked just as surprised as I felt, though somehow still retaining that ever-present feral air of his.

After a tense silence from both ends, Kidd let out a noise of frustration, letting go of my hair abruptly. I stumbled back, only to have him all up in my face again a second later. "Why can't you just grow a pair and be a _guy_?" he asked me, aggravated.

I blinked, still in a bit of a daze. "Um…what?"

"Never mind!" Eustass turned on his heel, his shoulders tense underneath the black fabric of his shirt. He made to walk away, but stopped and looked over his shoulder after a moment. "Get dressed," he mumbled gruffly, "We stop at the island in an hour."

I watched him leave, a dozen emotions fighting for my attention. I was indignant, angry, flustered, shocked…Pressing my fingers to my cheeks, I felt that they were warm; I was blushing.

Then the angriness took over and I slapped my hand to my cheek to wake some sense into me. What had I done? Kissed Eustass? _Eustass_? Sure, he'd been the one to initiate it, but was it possible that my lack of clothing had insinuated something? I wasn't learned in the arts of sexual suggestion, for crying out loud!

I huffed aloud. Well, it didn't matter, anyway. It wasn't like I'd _wanted_ to kiss him, or do it again. He was a jerk. Oh, and he was ugly. I totally wasn't attracted to him at all.

Maybe if I chanted it in my head enough times, I would begin to believe it.

_Eustass is ugly. Eustass is ugly. He is not attractive in the least. Not even his arms. His big, manly arms…_

Damn it.

* * *

**What do you think about the timing of the kiss? Too soon? Long overdue? Just right? Tell me your thoughts, yo!**


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